“Easter Egg” Hunt

I don’t talk a lot about the rest of my family because, well, they ask me not to. I did however have a great idea that I think my Dad should consider, so I thought I would share it because let’s face it, who among us wouldn’t like to try this.

Let me start with a little history. My Dad likes to golf. When he was looking at some land a few years ago, he realized that although it was a very nice place to build his new house, it was about an hour from the golf course he frequents. There was a lot of land, and he was about to retire, so what they hay, he decided to turn it into his private little golf course. I’m not talking 200 acres with pristinely manicured lawns and a water hazard or anything, but in my opinion, having your own tee boxes, fairways and greens is pretty cool.

A few years ago, my Dad and Stepmom decided to start an annual Easter Egg hunt at their house (which I have affectionately named “the Hacienda”). Since they have 9 grandkids, I thought it was a great idea – have all the kids over for lunch, and let the grandchildren run around the golf course that surrounds the Hacienda hunting Easter Eggs. It just sounds so quaint and relaxing, that is of course until they told me that they hid over 800 Easter Eggs. Let me repeat that .. OVER EIGHT HUNDRED EASTER EGGS!!!!!!!!

So I thought about that for a little bit and came up with my own idea:

Instead of hiding Easter Eggs, my Dad should color a ton of GOLF BALLS and then just hit them all over the golf course. Then, on Saturday, he can just go outside, put a couple of buckets by his lawn chair, and have all the grandkids go out and find the golf balls and bring them back and drop them in the buckets. I said that he could bring a few bags of Easter candy, and for every ball the kids bring back, they get a piece of candy.

Dad gets some practice, the kids find “Easter Eggs”, and everyone gets candy.

Now THAT’S how you should have an Easter Egg Hunt.

Addiction

I know it’s not something that’s very comfortable to talk about, but it’s something nonetheless that we have had to deal with the pat few weeks and I thought some light should be shed on it.

Unbeknownst to me, I married an addict.

I’m sure you can say that I couldn’t have known, that there was no way to tell, but as I look back, all the warning signs were there. The continuous references to it, the fantasy of flying around the world to satisfy the soul – paying the exorbitant prices they ask for them – and if you can’t get it legally there, turning to the streets, where prices are higher and the chances that you won’t get what you want.

I am of course talking about the Olympics.

Yes, I know, I would expect this from a guy, but from my WIFE? Now that it’s over, it’s a little easier to talk about, but I know she’s just planning for 2012. I thought she was just in love with London … but let’s get real, who can be in love with a country that’s usually cold and drives on the wrong side of the road? She’s just aching for the Olympics.

We have 3 TV’s in the house now – coincidence that 3 networks were showing different games simultaneously, I think not. She’s a careful planner she is. I think I saw her crafting the Wee Man’s walker into a Bobsled and pushing him down the hallway. And I wear after Shawn White was on the half pipe, I found a long red hair in the bathroom sink.

I came home one evening and caught her freebasing the biathlon.

As soon as they announced that Rio won the Olympic bid – she applied for a Visa.

Now that they are over, I think we’ll get a little sleep.

I know that one day we’ll kick this habit … but in the mean time, keep us in your prayers.