Stupid's like a box of chocolates ...

Now I want to preface this story with the fact that I’m an idiot, and I know it. I am HORRBLE with names.

I have been married to the Blonde for almost 4 years, we often have discussions about her cousin and his wife, but there have been numerous occasions where she would say something like “Lisa and Jim just got new car” and I would respond, “Who’s Lisa and Jim?” Now I don’t ever claim to be the brightest person in the world, but I do know my weakness for not remembering names very well.

I was at work today and I received and email from the Blonde. It said simpy “Hey Baby. I thought you would be better at this for Kim and Barry.”

That’s it. That’s all she said. It was a forward from a friend of hers that had a question regarding the impending relocation into our area of someone else they know.

I don’t know who these people are, so my email starts out “I have absolutely no idea who any of you are …” Well apparently that was the wrong terminology.

- “It’s Kim and Barry.”
- “so OK, it's Kim and Barry, is that some sort of rock group out of Boston?"
- "KIM AND BARRY ... WE HAD DINNER WITH THEM IN DALLAS!!!!"
- "Oh, the cool couple with the lettuce wraps?"
- "YES, YOU KNOW THEM!"

OK, so it didn’t go exactly like that, but you get the idea. My point is this. H (besides being incredibly HOT) is an extremely intelligent individual. And knowing that she has to follow even her cousin’s names with qualifiers like “Lisa and Jim ... my cousin” I would think that by now she would have learned that she needs to do that with just about everything for me, “Pick me up a tube of Crest … the toothpaste”.

I mean would it have killed her to speak to me like the idiot I am (which she eventually has to do anyway when she finally gets ticked off at me)? She could have said, "Hey Baby. I thought you would be better at this for Kim and Barry … In Dallas"

In Dallas ... two words ... would that have been so hard, now really? Now instead I get a WHOLE LOT MORE than two words, and I'm not sure, but some of them might have been four letters.

OK, the Vampire is doing well. Running a little fever yesterday, but I am clinging to the hope that it isn’t my fault. H’s Mom is here to help out, cooking and cleaning for a few days, so we’re really glad to have her.

H and I are in a groove at night, we sleep in shifts between 10 and 2 then 2 and 6. I get the 2 – 6 shift and generally try to feed the kid in the middle of the three I see, but last night I seem to have given the pillow half a bottle before I realized it and somehow ended up putting a diaper on the dog that was lying on the bed.

Speaking of that … she is HUGE. Poor Evie’s belly is just about hanging on the floor and she looks at me like “Ooomph!” when she’s simply sitting down. Soon our house will be filled with the pitter patter of little feet …. And the desperate cries of a grown man trying to feed puppies and baby every 3 hours. At least I get to leave for 10 hours a day … imagine what H is going to be like.